Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Where Do You Get Your 'Blues' From?

Hey y'all, this is Shaun Booker Dammit.! Let me first say that if you're taking time to read this, I LOVE YOU! Since I can't afford a therapist; I think this blogging thing is gonna be good for me.

Ask any artist where their inspiration comes from and most will answer " It can be anything" -- something you smell, see, remember ... whatever humans take in goes somewhere...  My first realization of transmutation came when I sang my first solo at age three. Granted, I had the advantage of a packed house of people who were already of the mind-set  to receive a message. In my grandfathers church I was surrounded by folks who were connected, obviously spiritual, and open to be moved emotionally.

"One has to be open to receive either good or evil," My Mama (maternal grandmother) used to say "the devil can't come in uninvited." I'm not preaching, I'm just saying we can invite or repel. We can choose to act or not. This past week has been one of those weeks in which my emotions have run the gamut and my will tested!

While getting ready for my gig at LaScala this past Saturday, I received one of those phone calls that interrupt your groove. I was doing hair and make-up and learned that one of my favorite Aunts was rushed to the hospital having trouble breathing. She was in critical condition and the doctors didn't know what was wrong.

Aunt Thelma, my deceased mother's sister, is the one whom, although she had five children of her own (one set of twins), still always had something for all of her family members and friends on birthday's Christmas etc... Aunt Thelma was the one that if she kissed your boo-boo it was instantaneously healed. Her smile, tone of voice, and her made-from-scratch, triple-layer chocolate cake would cure whatsoever ailed you.

She was in trouble.  I began praying, and from the upbeat tone in which her daughter, first cousin Tracy, was speaking, I was initially not so alarmed and very hopeful of a positive outcome. My cousin said she was still giving instructions. "Don't let them take my dentures out and, make sure your father takes his meds on time!" We laughed. So much like her, in distress and still thinking about others.Then the second phone call, before I got out the door, I was now informed that she was no longer on oxygen, now it was a ventilator, and she would be transferred to The Cleveland Clinic from our little hospital in Warren Ohio.

I started bawling, I knew I was losing my Aunt, the one whom after my mother passed I could call for parenting questions, bad relationship questions, family-tree questions. The lady who went to Paris for the first time at age 75 to visit Rhonda, the twin daughter, who is a bona fide scientist. This is the aunt who organized a family entourage the year after my mother died to see me perform in Port Clinton. She believed in me, and all of us, which made us not afraid to strive for lofty dreams of such careers as professional singers and scientists.

By the time I got to the gig, my eyes were swollen and red. I was weak, in and out of those crying jags, sad and angry! I felt helpless and hopeless. I was not Shaun Booker Dammit! I was a wounded puppy, I was a scared niece in fetal position. I shared my bewilderment with two band members and one fanfriend, before the next wave of the crying jag hit me. Doreen and I went to the bathroom, five minutes til' show time, to fix my face.

While standing at the mirror trying to get it together, out of a stall came a women with an oxygen tank in tow. She shared with my friend that she was recovering from brain surgery, and it was her 35th birthday.

BINGO! There went my pity party ....

"The show must go on," and it did. We had a great performance. I put everything in the songs I sang.

My Aunt Thelma passed away the next day, and it hurt like hell, but I was prepared.  I'm going to sing at her funeral this coming Saturday, I will be there for my cousins and my surviving aunts and uncles, and I'll drive back for our "Memphis or Bust Benefit!"

Where do I get my blues from?

This is page one ......

Much Love,
Shaun Booker Dammit!

4 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry for your loss. You look great! I'll be out to see you soon, it has been way too long.

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  2. I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your Aunt Thelma. Stay strong...as I know you will because you are "Shaun Booker Dammit"! As always Take Care.

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  3. I once was having a pity party over some health issues and a wise SANGER told me to keep walking. you are one of a few people I know that takes thwir own advise.

    Peace

    Anton

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  4. Saw the clip of the OSU video at
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nSJ0c4kAi0

    Can not wait to see entire show hope it is as good as your "Live at Vonn Jazz"

    Peace

    Anton

    ReplyDelete